I was recently having a conversation about turning 50 with a friend who is about 15 years younger than me. I shared with him my observation about how my appearance has changed lately and he was noticeably concerned. My exact quote was: “When I was 45, I looked exactly like I did when I was 25, but older. Now that I’m 52, I look like a different person.” He’s only known me for three years, so he couldn’t do anything but accept my reflection as true. It’s not completely true, but in a few years, it will be!
You know what? I don’t care – but I did. I struggled when I was 48. I didn’t struggle with my looks changing, but I struggled with the idea of mortality, and I struggled with 50 being right around the corner. As I moved onto 49, I was trying everything to manage my emotions – reading books about aging, going to therapy, and working out harder than ever to hold onto my youth. The harder I worked, the worse it seemed to get. However, as I approached 50, I seemed to give up. This wasn’t intentional or conscious on my part – it just happened. Giving up turned to acceptance, and acceptance has bloomed into peace.
And that’s where I am today. I’ve accepted mortality. I’ve accepted aging. I’ve accepted that thing that jiggles a little on my throat. At the same time, I haven’t given up. I still work out hard and still read about aging and still chat with my therapist a few times a year. However, I’ve accepted the outcomes – whatever they may be. I finally understand the phrase “Trust in God, but still lock your car.”
I think this is a lesson for sales professionals, too. You can’t control outcomes, and the harder you try, the worse it gets. However, if you simply focus on your process and trust that the right things will happen, you’ll enjoy more success than you’ve ever had. Don’t give up. Don’t get lazy. In fact, work harder than you ever have. Just let go of the outcomes, sit back and marvel at what happens!
